Tuesday, 26 March 2013

Episode 10: Experiment

But it wasn't the attendant.

Instead, a hunched over man with a balding head and a tattered football jersey stood, uncertain at the door. Behind him was a tall woman in a beach dress with sunglasses on, despite the incessant gloom of the train. Neither seemed to know what to do next.

"Can I help you?" I probed. They exchanged a look, adopted the furrow that was upon each brow within my car, and turned back to me. The bald man cleared his throat, but it was the woman who talked.

"Something isn't right." Apparently that had become the anthem of the locomotive. I looked over my shoulder for direction. None was forthcoming as I was met only with questioning looks, and so I opened the door a little wider, stood aside and said, "Come in."

They filed in obediently, and John shuffled aside so they had room to stand. No one really knew what we were doing here, myself included, and so an awkward, heavy silence fell upon the room. For the first time I noticed the passing of the train over tracks, could hear it despite the closed window. I frowned. The window.

Walking over to it, or rather stepping past John and the balding man, I grabbed the handle. My fingers wrapped around it, the metal cool against my skin. I took a breath, then lifted. It didn't move. I put more effort into it, heaving as hard as I could. Still nothing. I looked at the room around me, where the eyes were as puzzled as ever, the brows furrowed so deep they could spell words. I nodded my head and repeated the catch phrase: "Something isn't right."

The bald man cleared his throat again and scratched his eyebrow. He nodded and muttered something to himself as he edged his way through the crowd to look at the door himself. He ran his finger along the edge, still nodding, and then stood up briskly. He looked around the room for something and, apparently not finding it, took off his shoe. This was making less sense by the second, and I felt a faint disinterest creeping up on me. My brow slowly eased its form.

Suddenly he hurled the shoe at the window, and there was a clatter as the glass shook beneath the impact. Everyone's attention was drawn back like the tide as he reclaimed it from the ground and moved to inspect his handywork. He muttered an "excuse me" as he took instead to slamming the shoe against the window, thud, thud, thud.

After some time, the glass started to crack. I looked suddenly to the door, sure that the noise would be overheard. I went towards it, putting my hand against it and closing my eyes. Thud. Thud. THUD!

The window shattered.

5 comments:

  1. I will never understand why people wear sunglasses indoors. It's so... weird. Anyway, I think something big is coming. Hopefully a revelation of some sort. What else could the shattered window represent?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think they are finding a way of escaping, if that is possible. I find myself thinking more and more about what these characters could possibly have in common. Why were they trapped here? There had to be something that linked them all together that made them why they were here and someone else wasn't. I guess we'll just have to wait and see !

    ReplyDelete
  3. Glad I'm keeping you all on your toes, that's sort of the idea, after all. I want to tell you where I'm going with it so badly, but that would sort of ruin it, wouldn't it! Guess you'll just have to keep reading...!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I like the use of bold in this setting. It really helps to give the reader a sense of both the importance and noise created by the beating of the shoe. I would like to say that they escape at the point, but I don't think it is going to happen. As they all said "something isn't right".

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ooooh I was totally expecting the attendant to come in and go ape, this was a surprise! I still think that everyone on the train is dead cause they're always dishevelled and cause of the scene you had with Patrick in front of the subway car... I've also been wondering what's outside the train, I was going to ask in an earlier post but I think I forgot to... so excited now!!

    ReplyDelete